[AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH fuckinggggg pigs. truly hateful that she does relate to hana in a certain way. though it also feels like getting reminded of something super embarrassing she once did, like committing several horrible acts for a guy is the same as middle school cringe.
she instinctively reaches out to steady him when he staggers. and then she's silent for a long, long moment.]
It wasn't. If she really loved him, she'd have listened to Isshiki-san and his songs. She'd have thought about what he actually wanted instead of deciding on her own.
If someone doesn't care enough to listen, there's no way they can call that love.
Loving someone means... knowing when to take a step back and listen. You can't decide what's best for the people you love just based on your own selfish desires.
[which is a very funny thing to say right before the oinkers oink again-- and then there is another memory (7:15:12-7:18:34). a memory of living through the excruciatingly painful experience of having your physical body abruptly disassembled, bit by bit, until only your consciousness remains. and then, recognizing your mistakes and setting out to fix them, even though it means you won't be a part of this world anymore. remember when monika said there's nothing for her to go back to? yeah.
the ui aspects are all present in the memory. just pretend the protagonist's name doesn't exist.]
well, that was just as horrible an experience the second time around. monika has a bit of a faraway look after the memory ends, silently frowning for a moment, before she sighs.]
... Yeah, that's what I meant. You don't have to feel sorry for me or anything. It's just what it is.
Then if you can, I'll make sure to show you around.
[ as for that... ]
...I don't know yet. The reapers said we could choose when we go back, so that's something - I won't have to go right back to Hana pointing a gun at me, or anything. But I guess it means I'll have to figure out a way to stop her, and I don't know how to do that.
... It's too bad our psychs probably won't work outside of the UG. But with enough buffer time, isn't there a way you could alert security or something? Take the element of surprise away from her.
...But yeah. That's the only thing I could think of, but the problem is explaining how I know. It's not a small thing, to say someone's planning to try to kill you, or that they're with Adonis. And I can't tell them that it already happened, or they'll just think I'm crazy.
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she instinctively reaches out to steady him when he staggers. and then she's silent for a long, long moment.]
... I wouldn't call those technical difficulties.
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No. No, they weren't.
...I'm sorry for lying. I wasn't ready to think about it.
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[sir!!! she looks so apologetic.]
I'm sorry I found out like this.
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But... now you know why I could finish the concert. She was with those Adonis nutjobs, I guess.
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[she presses her lips into a fine line, and then she sighs.]
She had the audacity to act like it was an act of love, too... But that wasn't love at all.
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If someone doesn't care enough to listen, there's no way they can call that love.
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a small nod.]
Loving someone means... knowing when to take a step back and listen. You can't decide what's best for the people you love just based on your own selfish desires.
[which is a very funny thing to say right before the oinkers oink again-- and then there is another memory (7:15:12-7:18:34). a memory of living through the excruciatingly painful experience of having your physical body abruptly disassembled, bit by bit, until only your consciousness remains. and then, recognizing your mistakes and setting out to fix them, even though it means you won't be a part of this world anymore. remember when monika said there's nothing for her to go back to? yeah.
the ui aspects are all present in the memory. just pretend the protagonist's name doesn't exist.]
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So that's what you meant before. [ how do you respond to this? to someone erasing themselves like this? ] God, Monika, I'm sorry.
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well, that was just as horrible an experience the second time around. monika has a bit of a faraway look after the memory ends, silently frowning for a moment, before she sighs.]
... Yeah, that's what I meant. You don't have to feel sorry for me or anything. It's just what it is.
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Did you ever get an answer from the reapers? About whether you could go somewhere else.
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I asked Ruby that one time. But she was so baffled by the stuff I told her that I just... didn't get an answer. So I don't know.
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[ choosing not to be pessimistic about that, for once. ]
It's pretty normal there, and it's got a little bit of everything. There's no way you wouldn't find somewhere you like.
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I think I'd really, really like that, Kazuki.
[a beat.]
Are... you going to be okay, though? Going back to all of that?
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[ as for that... ]
...I don't know yet. The reapers said we could choose when we go back, so that's something - I won't have to go right back to Hana pointing a gun at me, or anything. But I guess it means I'll have to figure out a way to stop her, and I don't know how to do that.
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...But yeah. That's the only thing I could think of, but the problem is explaining how I know. It's not a small thing, to say someone's planning to try to kill you, or that they're with Adonis. And I can't tell them that it already happened, or they'll just think I'm crazy.